As you know (just kidding, you have no idea) I just hit 700 posts of pure bitterness. I haven’t checked with the Guinness Book of World Records (or is it a Guinness E-Book of World Records only available on Amazon Kindle. I don’t know), but I’m pretty sure it is the record of something. Maybe it is just a website? On another note, um who cares? Anyways, it’s probably a record amount of posts dedicated to pure bitterness. Though to be fair, I probably got the record around 7 posts, so I’m just adding to the record everytime I post something. Regardless, you are probably glossing over this whole part to get to the gifs and I don’t blame you. I can’t wait till this stupid intro is over too. Uggh, can I just introduce this thing already? Um, blah, blah, blah, many giftures. Be bitter or something.
Speaking of just getting to it…
…can we just hurry up and seal the deal?
And if you don’t like it…
…owl just get over it.
If you don’t feel like working…
…just duck out a little early.
Or hang out with your friends…
…and drive them up the wall.
Maybe go outside and…
…play some catch(just kidding I don’t go outside).
Maybe go to the local underground…
…and join the Fight Club, which I will seriously tell everyone about .
Don’t forget to…
…take out the papers and the trash…
Or you won’t…
…get no spending cash.
Make sure you put all your eggs in one basket…
…cause it is Easter and you have to keep your eyes on the prize.
Wow…
…I kind of nailed that one on the head.
High fives on that one everyone right…
…no?..low fives..anyone…uggghhh…
That’s it…
…I’m throwing in the towel.
And that is all you get for our weekly mess ups. I see the end of lent is coming so you can all get back to your vices, eat some way too sugary candy and chocolate, blame the Easter Bunny for making a mess all over your yard and house and get back to being super bitter on Monday as per usual. I’m out like a Santa Clause on Easter (or some confusing mixed metaphor like that.)
ARRRRGGGGHHHHH
Bitter 700 really bad tries Ben
Ben's Bitter Blog 
Happy 700th bitter posts! Don’t lose your bitter style 😊
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I’ll always have the bitter style regardless of how many posts I do.
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My head is spinning… 700??!! Good god, I was patting myself on the back for making it to 25! You have exponentially outdone me, and then some. Oh look, I got to finally USE something from math class! That is a WHOLE LOT of BITTERNESS, Ben, and you should be proud.
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You should definitely be patting your back for 25. That is a huge amount of things you aren’t bitter about yet.
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700! Well done. Think how accomplished 702 is going to feel.
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It will probably feel as lame as 1 and 50.
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Happy Easter, Bitter Ben!
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I wish it would have been, but didn’t turn out like I was hoping. Uggh.
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Too bad. But I guess it’s to be expected.
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That’s my problem. I always have expectations. I should know better.
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Damn! 700 posts, that is pretty impressive!
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When you have many things to be bitter about…it can just go on and on. You know how it is…well maybe you don’t. Because you aren’t bitter…at least not as much as me.
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Oh I am very bitter. I think with every day I get a little bit more bitter.
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That’s a relief. I was hoping you were still on board the bitter train.
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(bitterly, reeleee bitterlee, he adds:) i …
feel …
the
drain …
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Just don’t slip down the drain.
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Ben, that is quite an accomplishment, but the record is 701. I’m afraid this appears to be a premature (albeit bitter) celebration. On the other hand, that news must be a bitter moment for you, to be sure. So congratulations on your (almost) record post! 😀
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Yep, in fact maybe because I came up one short, I will just retire and move on so I don’t ever get the record and retire in bitterfamy.
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LOL. Nah, don’t do that. They’re too many more bitter awards out there to be conquered. I’m sure bitterfamy can wait a little longer. 😀
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But coming that close to getting the record is what bitter is all about.
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You do have a point there.
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congrats on 700!!! At first I thought this was about the Pat Robertson show.
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That would have been funny, but I know so little about that Club except when I am watching a movie on TV and forget to change the channel when it’s over and that guy comes on the screen.
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Love it. Dee
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The gifs really do carry the day.
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Congrats on 700. I’m seriously impressed. That’s more than 600.
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That’s what people keep telling me, but I wouldn’t really know because math was never my strongest subject.
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however, there has gotta be a YoonEyeVerse sum-wear , where 600 is more than 700. the anti-up-sighed-down (or over) nth-dye-(un)mentionable … yoonEye verse.
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Not sure which universe that would be. Maybe on Pluto?
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maybe on pluto. on, donder, on vixen, and to awl a good knight!
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Or as a bitter person would say, to all a Dark Knight.
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No, I actually knew it was your 700th blog because I’ve been counting and then I went back and counted all your blogs that you ever posted and then when I got confused I counted them again so why are you even telling me?
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It’s funny that you mentioned that because I was going to offer a prize for everyone that read them all, but then I changed my mind at the last moment. I just had a million Bitter Bucks laying around collecting dust.
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bitter bux?! i KNOW you just copied some Monopoly munny and scribbled over whatever wasn’t espeshulee bitter w/”bitter bux”. but(t) if so — there is probably sum place where that $$$ can be spent.
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They are the official money of the Bitter Blog and can be used to bribe me to do stuff and purchase bitter stuff on the other people’s sites.
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4t-you natelee, i don’t think one can purchase “bitter” @ my site. but i suspect there’s stuff (like wheeling, dealing, whining but not dining) going on at my site i don’t know about.
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There is actually a secret side site in connection with yours that people are buying bitter stuff with. Sorry that you had to find out this way.
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Oh really?? Because I was prepared in case there was going to be a test!
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Well, now it’s too late. The contest expired, so I just spent all my bitter bucks.
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Oh man!
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Just enough to make you bitter.
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