There’s nothing better than waking up early on a Sunday, sun is shining, birds are chirping, a cool breeze coming in through the window and you feel in your bones it is going to be a great day, and then you turn on the TV and the news comes on. Oh, yeah, I forgot, the news is always a sunshiny and happy. Well, not on my watch. Not only am I going to deliver the news in as lazy a way as possible, but also as bitterly as possible. So sit back, enjoy your eggs, and be view some Bitter News from the Couch…again.
Ben's Bitter Blog 
I really think you should have edited out the part where you were yelling at me about the snacks and the teleprompter, but I did make it look much better so you should definitely give me a raise. Also, I will gladly take over your hosting duties in exchange for you no longer paying me all that money to be your assistant. I know I will be getting a really fat salary from the B.E.N. network anyway. (By the way, my son has been watching your broadcasts over my shoulder and giggling like a hyena. What would you recommend?)
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Sounds like I need to start catering towards the kids your sons age. How old is he and does he and his friends have the ability to make something go viral? Cause I’m trying to spread a virus here.
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He’s almost 13 and I’m really not sure if he can make something go viral but I have caught the flu from him on occasion.
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Well, at least I now know my target audience.
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You have the same problem I do, and you have a right to be bitter about it: You have a face and a voice for writing. 🙂
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Luckily in this case, it seems to work for this type of news, because the more bitter sounding the better.
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It helps to have a bitter following.
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And I certainly do. Or at least they understand that I’m bitter despite their non bitterness.
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