Bitter Payback Friday Giftures


It’s national get back that jerk at work day.  I’m not sure if that is true, but we are celebrating that on a local level and by local level, I mean on my level.  And by jerk at work, I mean whatever jerk you want to find to get back at.  If nothing else, you can find someone who is acting snotty, or cocky, or snooty, or lame, or whiny and make them pay.  Revenge is a dish best served cold, but maybe it being served way too hot could burn the roof of their mouth and that could be just as bad.  So Revengerman your way to the weekend, but there’s nothing better than being bitter.

Let’s teach these humans that without their sunglasses…

Let's get some of that

…their automatically turn into vampires…

Let’s curse them…

...until they forget how to drink milk.

…until they forget how to drink milk.

Don’t you dare mess with exercise…


…or we’ll shoot you down. (Mentally too.)

You think you are going to shovel the snow…


…think again.

On the other hand…

On the other hand...

…looks like you scored the winning goal.

And guys just stop talking…


…cause women will get their revenge.

And quit driving so slow in the fast lane…


…or this is gonna happen. 

And then the commute…


…is gonna go downhill from there. 

And don’t mess with the animals…


…cause they will mess right back.

And remember they don’t say it’s the easiest thing since sliced bread…


…it’s the bitterest thing. 

Hey and good job on that last play…


…and I’m really sorry about this…so sorry.

Don’t worry…

...I'll let it slide this time.

…I’ll let it slide this time.

And remember to look forward in white hot anticipation to my inaugural edition of Bitter News from the Couch coming on Sunday Morning.  If you haven’t seen the teaser for it, check it out right here.  If you have, view it again so you can remember why you are jonesing so hard for it in the first place.  Either way, you can get payback by watching it so many times it goes viral and I’m thrust into the spotlight, which I of course hate.


Bitter Payback Gifture Friday Ben


23 thoughts on “Bitter Payback Friday Giftures

  1. That first one? Yeah, that’s me (only obviously not me), even with sunglasses on.
    I seriously laughed so hard over the snow shoveler. Shoveler should be a word. Why is it not? Why is there a red line under there?
    Anyway . . . internet is working here again! (That was only like . . . A MONTH. -_-) I’ll be sharing your video here shartly. (Intentionally misspelled. >.>) Looking forward to Sunday! 😀


    • So you’re a bit of a vampire huh? I used to have to wear sunglasses all the time, but now that I live here, the sun is so rare that I’m only a little sensitive to the light. And yeah for the internet working. Welcome back to the 21st century!


  2. Sadly, I don’t know any jerks at my work. Everyone here seems pretty nice. Then again, maybe it is not such a sad thing. Revenge is pretty lame, when you think about it.


      • I am doing okay! I did move into my new apartment. I think I like it.Think being the key word there. My summer was pretty awesome, but I’m feelin’ the blues back in my college town. I decided to at least do one semester of journalism classes and I can’t tell yet if I made the right decision.

        How was your summer? How are you? Videos now?


        • Good, well I hope you start liking your apartment better and better. I’m glad you had a great summer, though I’m sure you had some great experiences to write about and I can’t wait to hear what kind of craziness has happened with you.
          My summer was okay. We did a Disney Cruise/Florida visit for a week with my parents and siblings and all their families so it was fun/infuriating at the same time. It was nice to get away, but so hot and humid in the south. And yeah, videos now. I’m trying to build a fake bitter empire so that is just one of the ideas I’ve had lately.

          Liked by 2 people

        • Yes me too. I think it’s just a matter of settling into things!

          Florida sounds awesome! I am so jealous. I definitely have missed any kind of traveling whatsoever.

          I’m impressed with your video skills haha. I


        • Just make sure your roommates know of your awesomeness.
          Florida was good, but so hot. I don’t get to travel too much. It was a special occasion (my parent’s 50th). Otherwise, I’m pretty much a homebody.
          I’ll take the compliment even though it was mostly just a template I had to fill out. My real skills were put to test with the video coming out on Sunday. That was challenging but fun to do.

          Liked by 1 person

  3. Loving the teaser for the Bitter News Network. Can’t be any worse than the garbage they throw up and slap on cable. Bitterness and sarcasm is so much better than listening to people on TV who have no cognitive ability whatsoever. Bitterness and sarcasm take thought and talent. I’ll be tuning in.


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