I didn’t choose the turkey life, the turkey life chose me.
Since it is Friday and November, it is time for people to start thinking about things that they are thankful for. Other people that is. If you know anything about me though, I’m not other people though am I? So, I am going to talk about things I’m not thankful for.
My computer…
Where is the screen and keyboard again?
Un-fortune-ate times.
I’ve received bad readings ca-nine or 10 times.
Nighttime adventures.
Too lazy to walk downstairs for my midnight snack.
Movies…
Harry Potter and the Revenge of the Transformers 2 was a confusing movie. I didn’t like it as much as Harry Potter and the Transformers.
Quick Weekend Trips…
Hong Kong, South America was quite a trip.
Our pool slide…
All we had left was I Can’t Believe It’s Not Butter.
Video Game Time…
Pig Pong was really stressful.
I get that some of you have a tender place in your heart and want to be thankful for things at this time of year. That is easy. I assume you will name the usual things like family, friends, food to eat, a place to live. But I ask you what is it that you aren’t thankful for?
Aaaarrrrrggggghhhh
Bitterly Unthankful Ben
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Pingback: In case you missed it…It was a lazy week | Ben's Bitter Blog
#2 and #6 :D!!!
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I can’t count which ones are which so I will assume that you are not thankful about any of them.
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lol!
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Every Thanksgiving, I’m not thankful for enduring canned cranberries and the disgusting ridges the can always leaves behind.
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And don’t even get me started with the yams. And the forced conversations with distant relatives like my brother or sister.
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I am not thankful that I didn’t hit that deer this morning. If I had hit it maybe I could have had the day off…or not, knowing my boss.
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Or maybe you would have had to eat venison for dinner even though you don’t like the flavor.
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Big family get-togethers… rather eat nickels, alone.
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Any gathering for that matter. I would rather spend Thanksgiving alone not being thankful about anything.
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I am not thankful for the 2 hour project I worked on today, didn’t save, and was forced to watch as it was deleted into the abyss known as “nothingness”. So. Not. Thankful.
Also not thankful for 1.5 hours left of work when I wanted to go home 6.5 hours ago. Ugh.
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It must have made you pretty bitter when you realized that I didn’t go to work at all this week and I also didn’t do erase any good posts that I spent 2 hours on.
Don’t worry though.
I will have all kinds of work to greet me when I get back.
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My whole post today is what I’m not thankful for, and I can’t possibly complain any more without feeling like a fantastic butthole. But I’ll piggyback on your computer one. It may be the only thing I didn’t touch on in my post: technology – it hates me.
Great post Ben : ) That smile is fake, but everyone says “fake it til you make it” – something else I’m not grateful for. Hey I’m getting the hang of this bitter thing! Ishould probably stop now.
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Never stop trying to be bitter. I know how you feel about post though. Sometimes I slave over them and just can’t get them right, but I push through and just put them out there. And they suck.
And they make me bitter.
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You are very punny today. I am not thankful for people who don’t give the wave when you let them in (God knows you didn’t have to), to people who WRITE CHECKS in the grocery line and ask the cashier, “What’s the date?”, for crappy bras–even $80 ones–still crappy, for the backdrop on Arsenio’s new show which looks like 1983, for restaurant Cokes that aren’t mixed at a proper ratio of syrup to CO2, for gas prices, for the current failed joke of an administration, grey hairs, Tempurpedic beds that cost more than a car and still don’t fix your back and don’t let you jump up and down on them with a glass of red wine, and LASTLY, for people in public places who somehow forget to flush. And also the spell check, which seems to think Tempurpedic is not what I mean, but rather, distemper. As if.
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I really think you still need to think about some things that you are not thankful for. You barely took any time at all.
And yes, puns give out the most bitterness, so I practice every day.
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I am not thankful for little dogs. They’re like loud rats.
I am also not thankful for stairs. They hate me.
And maybe I should add the color beige. It’s the most noncommittal of all the colors. Is it brown? Champagne? Cream? Tan? It doesn’t know. Get it together, beige.
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You bring up a good point about colors. Some people call beige a color. I think there is really only about 8 colors, but every one is always added weird shades to them. There is red, blue, green, brown, black, pink. There is no eggshell, seafoam green, salmon.
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i love the turkey trotting and i can be not bitter if i want to, you can’t make me! (sorry, a bit too much time spent with my kindergarten perhaps!)
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Stop being with your kindergarten class so much. Too much positivity will destroy you. Bitter wishes!
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I’m thankful that there weren’t more words in this post than there are, but there could have been less so I’m not as completely thankful for this post as I could be.
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This could be added to your list as one of the things you aren’t thankful for.
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