You'd probably shocked to know that there was a time in my life where there was a lapse in my game playing. I call that phase of my life the dark ages, between the ages of 18 and 26, where I pretended to be responsible and grown up. Ironically, the event that brought the light … Continue reading Bitter Nominative Determinism BFG’s
First World Problems
Dependence Day BTG’s
Hey Bitter Gang! (I realized that I haven't named my followers with a clever moniker yet)! Like most American's, I've decided to take tomorrow, which is a Friday, off of work. It's not because I want to, because Friday's are typically the best day of work, because I usually spend the first few hours writing … Continue reading Dependence Day BTG’s
Younger demographic BFG’s
If you are ever looking to find a quick and easy way to spiral into a deep depression, I've got the fasted way to do it. I was perusing my recent stats on this blog and comparing it to my stats in April 2014, my best month of all time. I know exactly what they … Continue reading Younger demographic BFG’s
Scoliosis BFG’s
When I was a sophomore in high school, I had to get a physical in order to play basketball. People have been doing them for generations, so I didn't really question it, I just treated it as a routine requirement for playing basketball. The school set them up for us, and I went along because … Continue reading Scoliosis BFG’s
Brownie Point BFG’s
What has been going on this week? For me, not much except an absolute homicidal maniac strapping me to a chair, gagging me, shooting me with a needle full of drugs, leaving half my face numb, grinding my teeth down with a huge drill, covering my ears so I couldn't hear the torture, then sending … Continue reading Brownie Point BFG’s
Hacking Into Prison BFG’s
I've always tried my best to stay out of prison. I'm claustrophobic, for goodness sakes. I can't possibly imagine having to spend all my time in a 6 ft. X 8 ft. room for most of the day. Also, I'm an introvert. If I was forced to speak to people all the time, like having … Continue reading Hacking Into Prison BFG’s
I’m walking for President BFG’s
I've never been a big Halloween guy. Even the best part about Halloween, the candy, was ruined by Halloween. You know exactly what I'm talking about. Before Halloween, the world was filled with full sized candy bars as far as the eye could see. But then Halloween got this horrible idea to ruin candy, by … Continue reading I’m walking for President BFG’s
Musical Chairs BFG’s
A few weeks ago, we were watching the movie, Young Woman and the Sea, which is about the first girl to swim the English Channel. I wasn't aware that people could swim channels, but I knew they could surf channels. When I surf channels, I like to surf the ESPN channel. Mostly because I like … Continue reading Musical Chairs BFG’s
Bitter Trance BFG’s
I'm one of those people like Einstein, Benjamin Franklin, Nikola Tesla and Thomas Edison that doesn't like sleep that much. The difference being that I've found a way to make those waking hours much less efficient by inventing nothing. I've always been a night owl because I get FOMVG, which of course means, Fear of … Continue reading Bitter Trance BFG’s
Donut ever do this to me BFG’s
It seems like centuries ago, but my 30th birthday was on a Friday and my wife graciously said that she would pick me up right after work, so we could go to a movie. I was excited to go to a movie, but it was a little odd that my wife wanted to pick me … Continue reading Donut ever do this to me BFG’s
Storage Unit Madness BFG’s
There was a show on TLC called Storage Wars. It was a horribly annoying show about a group of about 5 or 6 people that would bid on storage units that had been abandoned by people. Audiences were intrigued by it for several reasons, I suppose. Some seemed to like the drama between the characters … Continue reading Storage Unit Madness BFG’s
Bitter Coating
Editors Note: You probably missed the Bitter Friday Giftures on Friday. Well, sometimes people celebrate the Independence of their country once a year. Sheesh, can you give a bitter guy a break once in a while? This is what I would have posted about if I was actually near a computer that day. Except for … Continue reading Bitter Coating
Plug in Charging BFG’s
Yesterday, I had a flashback to my not so glory days in Seattle. It was the middle of the day, and I was behind on some work I was supposed to be doing. Most of the time I'm behind, because I'm lazy, but this time it was someone else's fault. When I get behind on … Continue reading Plug in Charging BFG’s
51 Reasons I’m Bitter
Since we just had solar eclipse, it's relevant that I celebrate my 51st rotation around the sun by listing my 51 reasons why you or I should be Bitter. Lists - They are long and tedious and take a lot of time. The only one that doesn't is this one. Nerolinks - Better than hyperlinks, … Continue reading 51 Reasons I’m Bitter
Solving the National Debt BFG’s
I'm not known as a problem solver. In fact, the only instance there is on the books of me solving problems is when my wife wants to vent. As you know, women don't want you to solve their problems, they just want you to listen. She was trying to tell me that, but I was … Continue reading Solving the National Debt BFG’s
The Brinch who Stole Christmas…Vacation
Hello all. I'm pretty lazy when it comes to doing posts around Christmas, but I'm really good at reposting some classics. So I hope you enjoy. And Bitter Christmas to you all. He is as green as Eggs and Ham. He is as green as the Redwood Forest. He is as green as the Hulk … Continue reading The Brinch who Stole Christmas…Vacation
Logging In As a New Character BFG’s
I've been simultaneously listening and watching the movie Ready Player One a lot in the last month. A lot of fans of the book hated the movie, because they are wildly different. I was lucky enough to have seen the movie first and the read the book, so the movie didn't taint my feelings of … Continue reading Logging In As a New Character BFG’s
Rotational BFG’s
I've heard of some people that have lived in the same place, and the same home all their lives. I don't know if I can even comprehend that kind of situation, because I've been a nomad all my life. In chronological order, I've lived in California, New York, South Dakota, Idaho, 8 different locations in … Continue reading Rotational BFG’s
Chyron’s and Ticker’s and HUD’s BFG’s
There are two different kinds of people in the world. The ones that thrive being around other people, and the ones that thrive being around not people. If left to my own devices (ie computer devices), I could go months before needing human contact. As long as I have a couch, a TV, and some … Continue reading Chyron’s and Ticker’s and HUD’s BFG’s
Way Off Balance BFG’s
Yesterday, unlike most of my days at work, I spent most of the day trying to help balance a 13-story building of bottles to spell two words. It was a promotional video for Prime Day, and our social media team decided that we were going to build a wall of bottles and then smash through … Continue reading Way Off Balance BFG’s
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