March Bitterness

March makes me so bitter.  I mean just admit it March, you try to play it off but you know it is true.  You are not March madness, you are March Bitterness.  Try as you might to get us to believe that you are mad just doesn’t fly with me.  Take the NCAA’s for instances.  Are you to have me believe that March is all about the winner of the final game, or is it really about all the bitterness of all the 67 teams that didn’t win?  I can’t even begin to imagine how bitter all the teams are that didn’t win.  They are college students that have to do school work, that also have to wake up early and stay late for 2 hour practices and have to forgo all the regular bitterness of college and do boring practices for like 6 months out of the year, win conference games that give them enough RPI to get into the tournament, just so they can get bounced by some no name school.  And what about they no name schools?  How do they feel going 30-1, only to get to their conference final and lose to some school that was 11-25 and just happened to catch you on a bad day.  Tell me there isn’t bitterness in droves in March.  March must be so bitter knowing that it did all the work 67 some games, only to have April get the NCAA championship.  How bitter must March feel about April?  That doesn’t even start to begin to describe how bitter I am about spring.  The calendar tells me that March 20 something is Spring, and yet I look outside and the weather tells me that it isn’t.  Why must you make me so bitter Spring in March?  They say March comes in like a lion and out like a lamb.  But let’s face it lions and lambs are both bitter.  Lions are bitter that they have to chase their food.  I mean, why can’t the meat just come to them?  Why do they have to run?  Isn’t there some sort of McDonald’s Zebra quarter pounder out in the African outback?  Why does every meal have to make them so tired?  And lambs, well they eat grass.  Wouldn’t you be bitter if all you ate was bitter grass?  So what we can’t have some pork or ice cream every once in a while?  March must be so jealous of February, because they have so many holidays and jealous of April, because well April is just cooler, in a bitter way of course.  Here’s to you March, the bitterest month of the year.  Maybe next year you can be like April and not be March. 


Bitter  BenImage


2 thoughts on “March Bitterness

    • Nickie
      Interestingly and uniquely your understanding of the fact that I used a metaphor for the lion and the lamb make me bitter. In fact, what is this so called metaphor you speak of? It sounds like a fancy word for a meteor, which comes from space and hangs over us just ready to crush our hopes and dreams and that makes me bitter. Also that fact that you think I am funny makes me bitter. I am not funny Ben, but bitter Ben. AAAARRGHHH!

      Bitter Ben


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