Editing 2020 Bitter Friday Giftures

 

As writers, or wanna be writers like me, we are all pretty familiar with the editing process in one way or another. I also do a lot of video, so I know how painstaking editing can be to remove all the um, errs, and awkward pauses to make a good looking video.

Instagrammers are also pretty thankful for the editing process so they can completely change their appearance to the point where their own mother wouldn’t recognize them.  So, it seems like we should get to edit our own lives too right?

My question to you all is if you could edit your life, what would you choose to do with your editing power? I think I would edit all the umms, errs and uhhhs, and go back to those encounters with people I needed to impress and we-write jokes I thought of later, or insults that I thought of later, and I would like to pause those interview questions, so I had more time to think of the right answers. Oh, and I would ask people to the prom to get their reactions. If they were like, uh, naaah, or pretty indecisive, I would move and ask everyone til I got a good gauge of who was actually interested. Then possibly, my prom would have been slightly better.

On to the Bitter Friday Giftures, which I have much more editing control over.

You know I would do this…

Improve Mad Men GIF

…if I had my editing power.

It would also be pretty nice…

Green Screen Holiday GIF by visualbrand

…to change locations that easily.

With my bad luck though…

snapping guru studio GIF by True and the Rainbow Kingdom

…I would probably struggle with the ability to snap my fingers and end up in Russia.

Or accidentally…

Avengers Endgame GIF

…snapping half the universe away.

I definitely would have edited…

animation deal with it GIF by mezitlab

…my bad eyesight earlier…

But I would definitely…

knee ol GIF

…like to get some new knees…

I would do some re-arranging…

Back Pain GIF by memecandy

…of my spine…

I would re-arrange some shoulder…

dos equis brush shoulders GIF by Dos Equis Gifs to the World

…pain.

I would definitely…

sorry ed helms GIF

…photoshop some of that awkward out of me.

Take away some of those…

ed helms office GIF

…tears.

Add some strength levels…

king arthur strength GIF by Disney

…to these chicken arms. 

And add some endurance…

power rangers running GIF

…to these weak lungs.

There are probably some other things I would add to the arsenal, and definitely moments I would erase completely, cough 2020, cough. But in the end, it probably wouldn’t matter, because those editing moments would probably just add more problems to my life, because as Thanos said, I AM INEVITABLE.

What would you do if you had editing power over your life?

ARRRRRRGGGGGGHHHHHHHHH

Bitter Editing Power Ben

10 thoughts on “Editing 2020 Bitter Friday Giftures

  1. As I try to answer your question, I remember the short story of the Monkey’s Paw, an illustration of how the power to wish for changes has a cost–the outcome of the change is never as good as the wisher expected. So maybe I’d better not strive to edit my past. J.

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    • Yeah, I always believed that you are the kind of person you are because of mistakes or bad things that happened to you. In fact, most people that do life changing things are ones that had really horrifying things happen to them and their bad upbringings motivated them to make changes. It does give you pause though and makes you wonder what you would change and what you would leave the same.

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  2. Wow, such a rancorous question, especially since I suspect what befalls us molds us. Should I have reported my abuser, said yes to the English bloke and moved abroad, paid more attention to certain family members, not switched majors 3 times, rescued more dogs? I’m using the Popeye defense–I yam what I yam…don’t want a redo any more than I want a shorter hair do (long haired hippie forever). However, am still fond of Dickens theme in A Christmas Carol, Crichton’s Timeline… and blogs like yours that poke humor at the least favorite taste on our tongue. Jo

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    • While most people would not take the option to edit anything because they believe that things work out because of actions they’ve taken in the past, it is something most people would consider. While the movie Click with Adam Sandler does explore this option, and in the end shows us that editing our lives would just make them more complicated in other ways, I think there could be some positives that could come from it. Either way, it is a question to consider and one that should be thought through before saying you would choose either option.

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  3. Hmm, let’s see. I think I would delete some people from my memory and add an exclamation mark to others. I would also insert a comma to create nonessential phrases that got me into trouble to position them for deletion later. I would capitalize on more opportunities and suppress those dangling participles. Oh yes, and last but not least, I would ensure my sentences had parallel structure so as not to be misunderstood.

    Liked by 2 people

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