Attention Getting Bad Air Quality Bitter Friday Giftures

 

You would probably never guess this, but Utah has one of the worst air quality areas in the country. It’s this weird weather phenomenon called the inversion that makes it that way.

Then, in the late summer, because it is so hot,  we get these massive forest fires. This year, not so much. This year, we were lucky enough to get our bad air from out of state. Colorado, Nevada and California and sending us their forest fire smoke. You know, because sharing is caring right? Maybe we need to reconsider the sharing is caring thing after this year. No one likes bad air, smoke, or the Coronavirus, so let’s just stop sharing, shall we?

As insane as this is to say, I’m glad for the bad air quality news, because Corona has kind of been an attention hog this year, and I think it is finally someone else’s turn to get the spotlight, youknowwhatImsaying? I think Corona has been on the stage a little too long and it’s time to let the co-stars of bad news get to chew the scenery a little. Anyways, on to the Bitter Friday Giftures for a short time in the spotlight.

I get it…

attention GIF

…everyone likes to get attention in some way.

Some like my brother…

Animated GIF

…getting in your face about it.

Others like to whine…

shut up GIF

…and nag to get it.

Some like to pretend to do things…

ill do it 30 rock GIF

…just to get it.

Some like to make fools…

r and r wow GIF

…of themselves.

Or they like to…

Stand Up Comedy GIF by NBC

…tell funny jokes.

Some like to get attention…

take notes GIF by US National Archives

…through their writing.

Some like to get attention….

feels bill hudson GIF

…by working hard and getting awards for their work.

Some get attention…

big brother talk GIF by Big Brother After Dark

…from talking too much.

Some do it by…

Stand Out Goofy Movie GIF

…trying to be different.

Forest fires…

 

Burning Daft Punk GIF

…get attention by going to the extremes.

But the worst possible way to get attention…Sick Corona GIF by Camdelafu

…is to go viral. So, my suggestion is this. Stop all you little techniques to get my attention, because I am trying to develop an attention repellent to keep all you attention seekers away, so I can go back to my troglodyte lifestyle.  We only have a limited amount of attention currency and your kind is no good here.

ARRRRRGGGGGGHHHHHHHHH

Bitter Attention Deflecting Ben

15 thoughts on “Attention Getting Bad Air Quality Bitter Friday Giftures

  1. HEY! We get our fires from the West too! Right now we’re fighting the second worst fires in Colorado history. It’s annoying af because SOME of us have asthma and it affects our breathing when we go outside. Today we can’t even see the mountains, it’s totally hidden by all the smoke and I only live 25 minutes away from the mountains.

    Like

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