Mowed the lawn.
When I was a kid, I played basketball, mowed the lawn, snowblowed the driveway, and did several paper routes. I also worked for a bed delivery company that made me work 40 hours a week delivering beds, all at the same time. I never got tired.
You could see my ribs then. That was a long time ago. It was awful time where I had energy to do things.
Thankfully as I got older I made a course correction. Or my body getting older did. I used to be able to eat pizza all the time and not get this sensation called heartburn. Now, I can drink a glass of water as gross as that sounds, and break out in heartburn.
Every Day.
I used to be able to eat a Costco sized barrel of M&M’s and lose weight. Now, I look at one, and get heartburn.
I’m glad I’m not like that young fella. He hardly ever sat around enjoying the bitter things in life. He went outside and participated in things. He tried to talk to people, become friends, and be ignorant of how bitter people were. I’m glad he grew out of it. He finally broke the metabolism and became someone that didn’t want to accomplish stuff.
ARRRRGGGGGHHHHHHH
Bitter Metabolism Ben
Ben's Bitter Blog 
One of the great things about getting older, Ben , is there are so many more things to be bitter about! Thanks for being our bitter champion.
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I know. The more the days go by, the more I find to be bitter about. It is a jubilee of bitterness.
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I knew a guy like that once. What a chump. He thought the world was his oyster. Then he took a bite of the world, vomited, and realized it was true.
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I did a flip when I turned 19. Before I was 19, I could eat anything and not gain weight. Now I can eat a piece of lettuce and gain 10 pounds.
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Oh, that terrible metabolism. If I go out for a nice meal, I gain 3 pounds. If I eat lightly for a week, I lose 0 pounds. Now I need to lose my Christmas weight, Easter weight, and my birthday supper weight! AARRGGHH!
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I know it seems like I am backordered on all my weight loss days. Stupid weight loss garbage. I think it needs to be a little nicer.
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Mine’s been broken for a very long time…. Add to that menopause OMFG!
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I must have dropped mine.
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Have you ever thought of getting a copy of John F. Kennedy’s “Give that chicken fat back to the chicken?”
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No, because I’ve never heard of it. How do I get a copy?
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Actually, it’s on Youtube. In a Whoollllee lot of different versions. (And also the moose song) The key words are give that chicken fat back to the chicken. Have fun.
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I will have to take a look at the Youtube. I’m sure my kids know how to find things on there because they are constantly on there.
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Check out Youtube Robert Preston Go you chickenfat go, or google, Give that chickenfat back to the chicken. The entry also contains the moose song. Ps believe it or not, we actually did this chicken nonsense every morning at school, because the president asked us to. Right before the pledge to the flag, and waiting under our desks for the Conalrad alert that we weren’t being attacked that day. Actually, the best thing for a metabolism is laughing.
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The president asked you to do that? What school does that?
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Every school in the USA during the Kennedy administration. We were scared silly that the Russians had a space program, and might attack us, so we decided to make the nation fitter. This little gem of a song was premiered on the Johnny Carson show one night, and the next morning…pow. Every school in America. Along with fitness tests. It developed into the Airforce Aerobics programm, that was used on almost every college in America as a standard for fit students. (And hit the year I went to college- from the chicken fat song, to “a mile in under twelve minutes” in four years )
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Ahh, I remember doing the presidential fitness test when I was young. Didn’t know it was so we could fight the Russians though.
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And wait till you really get old!
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I can’t wait. It is going to be awesome to retire and be even less ambitious.
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