As you probably have heard, the Cubs won the World Series the other night. If you haven’t it’s because you were hiding in a bunker for the last 108 years and didn’t know that it was such a big deal. If you were hiding in a bunker, welcome back. A lot has happened since you hid in your bunker. Mostly this thing called the internet that you are viewing for the first time. It’s basically the most important thing to happen ever. Because there is this thing called a blog that I use to make fun of you and the 6 billion other citizens of the world. By the way, there are 6 billion people on the earth now. Anyways, so the Cubs broke their “curse” of not being able to win, so it had to be transferred to me. Ever since they won, I have lost every game I haven’t participated in. It kind of sucks, but I’m used to losing. Here are the cursed giftures of the week.
This girl…
…made even getting in bed a hard task.
Some people are in such a hurry running…
…that they didn’t realize that walking could get there just as slow.
While some people don’t realize…
…that having a ball isn’t so much.
Some people don’t have a leg to stand on…
…or to land on.
Some people’s favorite movie is Captain America Winter Soldier…
…but this guy prefers Deadpool.
While some people…
…just can’t weight.
When there’s something strange in your neighborhood who are you going to call…
…probably not this slowpolk.
When it comes to horsing around…
…this guy doesn’t.
Future gymnastics hopeful…
…everyone.
I wish I could…
…Red Sea what is going on at this game.
Just another tree…
…destroying the lives of people as well as its old wood buddies.
Annnd…
…sorry what was I saying?
Now that you’ve read this post, if you don’t pass it on to 15 friends, then you will be cursed for a lifetime. Don’t believe me? One lady refused to pass it on and for the rest of her life she got spilled water on her shirt once.
ARRRRGGHHHHH
Bitter Cursed Friday Ben
Ben's Bitter Blog 
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I feel my own curse coming on.
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I’ve had a few them in my time. Like being around people is a huge curse for me.
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Reblogged this on gudgerblogdotcom and commented:
http://www.derrickgudger.com
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Passed it on like you said and they all unfriended me. Now what?
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Now you are less cursed, because who needs all kinds of friends? Just a bunch of different people trying to talk to you. Sounds like things worked out great!
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Not for nothing, but I thought you were already cursed and lost at everything you ever did or didn’t play, hence the bitterness which you take to new and artistic levels.
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Of course I’m always cursed. Which is my I’m always bitter. That was just another example.
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Yeah, as Scottish people living in the US, we just happened to be in an Irish pub in Chicago on Friday night. Seemingly there was some kind of baseball game going on….. 😉
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You probably should have got the memo to not be in that city that night.
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Yeah, I never get the memos. Totally had the wrong colour top on that night too…
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That must have made some people mad. Hopefully, you used your Irish charm to get people to chill about it.
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Pingback: Friday Feeds | Candace Vianna Writes
Thank you for the innumerable GIF-ts.
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It’s what I do every Friday, so tune in if you want more, or tune backwards to previous Fridays and see more.
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The moral of the story: One bed at a time.
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There are no morals to this story. Goldilocks needs to stop trying to sleep in everyone’s beds.
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There go my plans for the weekend.
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Really?!! Don’t tell me the Doobie Brothers broke up too??!
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Now they are just solo acts Doobie and Brother.
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I always thought Doobie made the band anyway.
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Probably because he was way better at playing the flute.
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Right!
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Reblogged this on saywhatumean2say and commented:
I think I can handle spilled water…but trust me there are other ways to be cursed. Mostly I just curse but sometimes what goes around……etc. Consider this pass and tell someone in charge to stop cursing ME!
~~dru~~
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I hate when my water spills. Almost nothing worse than that.
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Ohhh that poor girl in the weight room. Hope she didn’t break her neck—or anything else for that matter!
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I think she was just wanting to take a nap, so did it on purpose.
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How just like a fitness fiend. Always going out of their way to demonstrate how to exercise, and then they sit back and nap while you do all the work. Why, a man could lose calories doing that sort of stuff!
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And how are we supposed to be able do things when we are all in shape and stuff. Sitting on a couch you get such a better perspective on life.
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I know what you mean, Ben. For example: My wife has started calling me a shape-shifter—due to all the time I spend on our couch. Now… if all of a sudden I were to just get up and throw away my remote and start exercising… well, that would be the end of my perspective! And I was just starting to get used to the idea of not being able to see my feet when I bend over.
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And what is wrong with being a shapeshifter? Like molding to a couch is a bad thing?
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Or the remote being grafted to my hand is anything to be ashamed of. 😀
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As a wannabe cyborg, I would really appreciate a universal remote attached to one of my hands, a cup full of cherry limeade in my other, and my head to have a pizza box attached. Then these useless hands could be replaced with something more worthwhile.
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These gifs, I just can’t stop laughing. I feel like maybe laughing at others’ misfortune makes me a bad person…but they’re the ones who put it on the internet, so I’m going to give myself a pass on this self-judgement.
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And since I am always putting them out there for you, it is totally acceptable.
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I wanna borrow the Red Sea guy during rush hour today.
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Yeah, he would come in handy when we are trying to wake our kids up in the morning too.
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Obviously the guy who fell by the horse was just asserting his dominance. He was showing the horse that if he tried, he could pull what looks to be a sweet wrestling move on him.
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Yeah, that horse doesn’t know what is coming to him soon.
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Reblogged this on HarsH ReaLiTy and commented:
I hadn’t heard the Cubs won. Did anyone else hear the cubbies won? 😂😉 -OM
Note: Comments disabled here. Please visit their blog.
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I also hadn’t heard they won either. I was too busy watching the basketball game.
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The real curse is here is that Sox fans won’t hear the end of this win for another 108 years.
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Just like the White Sox have been hearing about the last time they won in 1908. Was there 5 million people at the celebration parade for the White Sox when they won it last?
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Ben- So many idiots not enough time to blog about all of them. I have so many questions. Why couldn’t Tom Green have just gotten a ball the right way by asking someone? Is it really so important to be watching someone taking a picture of you instead of side stepping a barrier (yeah, I am talking to you idiot girl with your dog)? This gifture has made my otherwise bitter Friday somewhat less bitter…..
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Which is why I have a blog to expose all the idiots and all the things that make me bitter about them.
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After this election, you will have so many things to blog bitterly about.
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And probably won’t do it, because I hate talking about these people.
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We all do but we have 4 more years of talking about them ahead of us. I am sure that makes you extremely bitter.
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No we don’t. As soon as one of these clowns get elected they can go choke on something and be out of my life for four more years.
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I don’t even know what Pence or Kaine stand for, yet more to be bitter about because then we will have to hear about them when they take office after their respective running mates choke.
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It should be fun to find out what kind of presidents they will make, because like you said, we don’t know anything about them. But could they be worse?
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I am ready to vote for Bruce Campbell’s fictional character, Ash Williams. Nothing is cooler than a man with a chainsaw for a hand.
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He would make a good president. If things got a little hairy in the middle east, he could use some chainsaw justice.
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Yes, please! Anything but the 2 idiots that are making me very bitter.
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I just saw a chart in my analytics class. It shows a pie chart of the amount of idiots in the 1870’s. I think this would have come in handy for the amount of candidates for president in 2016. The total would have been two out of two. http://www.handsomeatlas.com/us-census-statistical-atlas-1870/idiots-aggregate-number#z=2&lat=0.6000&lng=0.4003
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If I would have had a chart pertaining to idiots when I was in college, maybe I would have stayed with my statistics/analytics course instead of dropping it. It sure would have come in handy in the future. Now, I am even more bitter!
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Yes, it does have a way of capturing my attention to something I didn’t care about before. So that is a good thing. And yes, everything makes me more bitter.
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Very funny, but I feel safe I don’t drink water only coffee
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But there is water in coffee, so essentially you drink a lot of coffee flavored water.
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Now I’m bitter about my coffee drinking, too!
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I know right? You had no idea how much water was in coffee.
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Well, if I put whiskey in as well, the proportion of water will be less.
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I guess according to science you would be right.
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