Friday’s are normally associated with pizza, being lazy at work, and Parties. One of these things are not like the other. I’ve never much liked parties, because I don’t like loud, I don’t like people, I don’t like talking and I don’t like being on someone else’s couch. In fact, the only good thing about them is that you don’t have to clean up after yourself and you can provoke other people into fighting because people are so intense at parties.
There are many reasons why people like to party…Let’s take a look at giftures that explain why people like to party:
Some people like to start the party off slowly…
…by trying a little dancing.
While others like the more direct approach…
…of burning down the house.
Some are a little standoffish…
…while others are a little more affectionate.
Some like to come for the fun…
…while others prefer not to save any drama for their mothers.
Some like to…
…make up their own dances…
While others…
…like the Funky Chicken or the Penguin Dance.
Some like to play…
…the crazy pranks…
While others…
…like to laugh and not let any of the others play any reindeer games.
Some have to leave early…
…because they have to go to work.
While others…
…are all about the food.
Others like to jump…
…right into the party…
While some…
…are happy staying riiight here.
Be assured bitter friends, I will be right where I am every Friday, eating Pizza, laying on the couch and not partying with the rest of you. So have fun getting in your fights while I enjoy not partying like a rock star.
ARRRRRGGGGGHHHHH
Bitter Not Party Ben
Ben's Bitter Blog 
I thought I was the only un-party one! So good to know I’m not alone in this 🙂
Also, what the heck is that guy doing with that inflatable ball? Can’t he just crawl into that like any other normal person? Or just stuff his kid in there (which is what they do where I live)?
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That stuffing yourself in the ball thing sounds like not smart. So people do that in the Netherlands? See what we are not missing while partying?
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I see it, when the kids play on the field in front of my house. Sometimes such ball-games are hosted and people hoist their kids into one. Looks so ridiculous, but they love it. Their legs and feet poke out, btw, so it’s cute seeing them run around, trying to knock each other over.
But that’s kids. Grown-ups should just… Not do it. Or at least refrain from filming themselves if they do.
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Though it’s great for me to be able to film it, because it makes for great giftures for the blog.
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True that.
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The edit ed half remember after action reports are much more humorous. Adventure is when you’re up to your ass in alligators while some lazy bastard’s on the shore writing a song about it. Stay on the couch my friend.
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Staying on the couch allows you to observe so many funny things happening. The idiots who do the funny stuff don’t remember because of the concussions they get from doing the dumb stuff.
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I don’t care, I don’t like to party. I’m an introvert with a sense of humor. Sue me. Good for you. Go on with your bad self!
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Yep, introverts like to party it up, by themselves by sitting on the couch and watching other people doing stuff on the TV.
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I would say that is a fair assessment.
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Pingback: Bitter Ben… a misanthropic kindred spirit… Check out his Bitter Friday Party Giftures | Candace Vianna Writes
I’m right there with you, home sweet home!!!!
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Home is where the couch is, I always say.
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I think partying like a rock star actually entails getting up off your couch!
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I always find a way to party from the couch. It’s a lifestyle.
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It appears that you got all of your Friday gifs bitterly downloaded. Did it take bitterly forever?
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I did, but it took a while. When you get good at it like me, you learn to figure it out. Thanks for the additional Dada.
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Yep, highlight of my week. Pizza and a movie in my chair! 🙂 Not that I don’t like a good party once in awhile, if I can get out of my chair, after a long week. 🙂
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That pizza in a couch is kind of the highlight of the week.
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Other than a couple of weddings like, a decade ago, I don’t think I’ve ever been to a party where people danced. Instead, most parties seem to involve less interesting stuff, like eating and socializing. Bah! I’d much rather stay home and read a book.
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I’d rather be home watching TV and playing video games.
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Right there with you!
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Laying on the couch is so much bitter than going to a party.
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Definitely!
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Kids ate all my deep dish pizza yesterday, I had to settle for bitter left overs because I spent the cash on the prior pizza run. Again with the leftovers for lunch today. At least I’m the one who cooked the leftovers so I know they’re good. We have lots of cheese in the house, perhaps I can make my own deep dish tomorrow and eat it before anyone notices me. They usually make me share. Aaaarrrrrggggghhhh! Enjoy your not party. How do you get solitude? The family wants to prattle on about everything- I caught a pokemon. I need help with homework. The goldfish died again. Mom wants you to work around the house. We need to talk about _____. Blah, blah, blah, and they want me to respond in some meaningful way. I know what I want to hear, and there are motivational words that would coax me from the couch willingly, but the ones I seem to always hear are NOT those words. What’s your superpower, Ben?
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Yeah, being a dad means doing a lot of pretending to help around the house, being talked at by multiple people at multiple times and taking care of food. My superpower: pretending to care.
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damn, I wish I could have that one, but Mrs M has very strong powers of denial. Case in point, she tells me “no” all the time.
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Yeah, wives are really good at telling us no aren’t they? Like why can’t I just take the kids bungy jumping? It’s good for their dexterity.
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bungy jumping? why go bungy jumping when you can take them base jumping. Or, this: http://www.industrytap.com/humans-flying-over-225-mph-inches-above-trees-and-cliffs/3477 Kids, wear the red one, that way if you make a mistake no one will know, and you’ll always get a posthumous perfect 10 from the olympic judges.
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I won’t be base jumping. I’m just there to support my kids doing so. Because I’m a good dad like that. Why can’t my wife see that?
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So, no one invited you to any parties, huh? I feel your bitterness.
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Probably because I’m a party pooper. Of course.
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Our Fridays are GAME NIGHT…the whole family gets into it.
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My Fridays are play video games and lay on the couch day.
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g r e a t m e m e s b r u v 😆 😆 😆
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Yeah, they kind of are.
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Come to party on Friday Ben
Leave on Saturday
That’s when it ends
In this time if you befriend
Anyone more bitter
Tell me when
You left a chicken for a hen;-)
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So true, so true. Would this be a haiku or some other type of poem.
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Not a Haiku
Hmmmmmm
ku ku
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Nice try. You know that’s a Haiku, or some other kind of poem.
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categorically ? no idea
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