A blade of grass. Swaying back and forth in the rhythm of the summer night’s warm breeze. Not a care in the world as it feels the purple sunset’s warmth cascade down its back. Thoughts of summer’s past. Soft music hangs in the air, in concert with crickets chirping. The blade feels peace, serenity. Then a moment later an engine roars, the putrid mix of gas, sweat and oil permeate the air and the blade of grass is mowed down, only moments earlier being invincible.
We might all feel the same way. We may sit around in our little deck chairs, feeling the warm breeze, chilling on the porch, until one day, a Friday, we are assaulted and mowed down by the loud roar of Friday Giftures. When only moments earlier we were invincible. Try not to get mowed down by the bitterness.
Don’t you hate it when you are trying to slide down a roaderslide…
The snowflake is even less safe from getting mowed down…
This truck was trying to find his long lost girlfriend…
I thought I wanted to be a lawyer someday…
Some people…
Soon after this guy avoided the train…
After this near miss, this Miss became a Bee Gee…
Speaking of near misses…
How would you feel if you were…
Sometimes you are just at a meeting…
Do you ever feel like you got hosed…
So are we finished here…
Well, off to go pretending that I’m invincible, while maniacs try to prove that I am not. Should be amazing! Good luck surviving your weekend!
ARRRRRGGGGGHHHHH
Bitter Blade of Grasshopper Ben
I missed your Friday Giftures, they always make me snicker :’)
And omg that shark situation is the sole reason why I’d NEVER go into one of those diving cages…. D:
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I know right? So are you back from your Canadian vacation? Hope you had a fantastic time!
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I am and I did! 😀
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Good to hear it. So I guess welcome back to the world of blogging to you to!
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I guess you’re right! Thanks 🙂
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How do you find time to look for all these photos and write long essays every single day? …not that I’m bitter, or anything.
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Well, work avoidance really helps. And ignoring the kids for long stretches of time works too. And I don’t write every day, only about 4-5 a week.
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That motor cycle crash freaked me out!!!! I feel like I got mowed down a few times this week but I’m a weed and won’t go away, bounce back every fucking time! 🙂
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You are always the one that gets right back up. That’s why you are so valuable at your company. Cause you don’t let those weeds you work with to get to you.
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Ha!! That’s sweet of you Ben. Wish I had you at work with me. You could be my Besticle 😂
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I would finally have someone to complain bitterly to all day! Sign me up!
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That was close. After that first paragraph I thought you were going to get all Walt Whitman on us. I should have known better. Doesn’t anybody stop when they run you down anymore?
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I like to think that I would stop and check on someone after I mowed them down, but then again I mow down grass all the time without stopping to think that I am cutting down grasses life all the time. And accidentally stepping on ants too.
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Seems to me that Mr chainsaw hedge trimmer is wasting energy and I also feel a little bit traumatized by the “performance art” somehow. It might be excellent exercise, but I wouldn’t even try that method. All you need is a barker charging admission and this: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zjedLeVGcfE
I’ve seen people like the teeth lady before, but after that I was blinded for a week. Her laser probably eats souls, or at least cuts them down like unsuspecting innocent blades of grass before the mower are silent.
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I would pay admission for that guy. In hopes that some horrific accident happened that I could witness.
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