There are two kinds of people in the world, introverts and extroverts. Some claim there are weirdo’s called ambiverts (a combination of both), but then again, some people claim there is such a thing as unicorns, dragons and people that don’t like Cheetos.
Since those kind of people technically don’t exist, there has been a battle raging between the cravers of small talk vs. the cravers of the couch.
In this corner, we have the extroverts. They love the holiday season for the parties and the people and then the chance to jibber jabber until the Christmas and Halloween lights turn off. They crave the meetings, motivational speaking, being the center, right and left of attention, the friends and family gatherings. They crave the online video gaming, the board game gatherings, even the Game of Throning. When it comes to this battle, they are bringing some friends to the fight.
In the other corner, here come the introverts. Actually, they prefer the corner very much. They love the holidays for the sitting by the fire, writing their family Christmas letters, hunting out the one person they feel comfortable with at parties and clinging to them for dear life. They enjoy binge watching, binge eating, binge reading, binge staying home, binge beard growing, binge NanoWriMoing and binge party avoidance. When it comes to the battle, they are uniting together separately!
So, who is winning the Battle Royale! Will it be the talkers or talk avoiders? The party goers or the party planners? The 16 player online battlers or the 16 hour solo RPGs?
ARRRRRGGGGHHHHH
Bitter Battle Ben
all true except the Cheetos thing. I have to call out the Cheetos if only for the Flaming Hot variety that taste awful and give me the runs.
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I’m only a fan of the Crunchy kind. The flaming hot ones? No thanks.
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“and binge party avoidance” – Oh man, I LOVE party-avoiding. I could party-avoid every night of the week.
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Now THAT sounds like a party. Avoiding parties all night.
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I am strictly an introvert. Painfully shy. I don’t mind being quiet for long periods. I hate it when some people judge me for that. Huh.
And I live cheetos. When I was young, I did not touch any other chips. Just me and my lovely cheetos. Craving some right now. 😛
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I’m so introverted it isn’t even funny. My daughter and wife are too. On the other hand my son isn’t and sometimes he drives me crazy. Every night I plop myself down on the couch and just take a moment or 10 to myself just to recover from him.
And Cheetos, I had no idea how many people were opposed to Cheetos. It’s good to see others that love them like I do.
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In my family, I guess I am the only introvert. Whenever we are meeting new people, my elder sister and mother tend to take over the conversation. I’m actually jealous sometimes. They are comfortable in every situation. My dad can be brutally honest. Some find it amusing, some offensive. He talks, depending on the company.
I on the other hand, almost never participate in a conversation with new people. I tend to hide behind extroverted people. I befriend many extroverts! They become essential tools when holding conversations with classmates and all. 😛
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That must be really weird to have a family full of them. It must be hard to be misunderstood when you actually want to spend time on your own.
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Not really. They understand when I say I want some “me time”.
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You’re lucky to have people that understand that. At work they don’t understand, when I just want to take a nap for a few hours under my desk so I can get my “me time”.
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Haha! I love this! Oh the things the internet has allowed us to do. Now, we can talk amongst ourselves and create stuff! I’ve been thinking… Maybe we should come up with a line of T-shirts for introverts so that they don’t have to actually talk to anyone, the t-shirt will say all that is needed. 😀
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Yep, the internet is awesome for introverts! I’m pretty sure if it wasn’t for the internet, I never would have met such awesome introverted bloggers like you. I consider them some of my favorite friends, even over real people I know.
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Just read the post that spoke about this one and it took me a while to scroll through your comments. I am an introvert. I can act excited and be enthused about pizza and napping. People like to think I’m an extrovert but it takes so much energy to be around people. After I am around them, I need to nap for like 3 days straight. INTROVERTS UNITE and by UNITE I mean let’s stay behind the computer screen but use caps lock.
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Yes. A lot of people that are introverts think they are extroverts because they can mix really well socially in a party, but like you said an introvert can do that, but they get warn down and exhausted when they do it for too long. So like you said they need some sort of retreat or nap or time alone to process things. So yeah, you are spot on!
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I’m actually writing a blog on this topic and I found your perspective spot on. Thank you!
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Just make sure you don’t proclaim that everyone likes Cheetos, because that statement got most of my commenters ire. Who knew right?
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Pingback: The Bitter Offensiveness of Cheetos | Ben's Bitter Blog
I’m an introvert. I prefer to hide in a climate-controlled corner, munching on Cheetos and taking bets on which fast food restaurants would survive if they all declared war on each other. Personally, I think those that serve curly fries will be the winners of a fast food war. I have no idea why any of this is relevant to your blog but thanks for letting me share.
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Honestly I think the ones that cater to me the most will survive. And the curly fries are the ones that go the farthest in my book.
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Since I do a lot of public speaking, people might be surprised to learn that I’m an introvert. But I definitely need to be alone to relax and re-energize. Ambivert? No way! If I promised to attend a party and it is canceled, I am deliriously happy. J.
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I don’t do a lot of public speaking, but when I do, I don’t hate it. I just get really relieved when I’m done and need that time to take things down a notch. At least you recognize it. Some others think that because they public speak they are extroverts.
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Before the talk I can be pretty nervous. During the talk I feel fine. After the talk I’m OK, except that people always want to come up and talk to me one-on-one. Somehow, that’s harder than talking to the whole group at the same time. J.
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Honestly I think most people get nervous. Even some extroverts. But that nervousness usually helps you know you are alive. And yeah, when you are doing the speech at least people don’t interupt and ask stupid questions.
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Reminds me when I asked an introvert named Wayne Knox what size party he enjoyed attending. His answer: ‘Knox, party of one’.
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I’m not sure who Wayne Knox is, but that sounds like my favorite kind of party.
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Oh and I took a Myers-Briggs test – INTJ is me…I=Introverted. And I wasn’t just a little on the I spectrum, I was on the 85 percentile of Introverted (considered extremely introverted). And yes, J = judging. HA.
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Yeah, I took mine recently and it was pretty high on the Introverted Scale too. Not even close. I can’t remember the other ones, but Introverted wasn’t even close.
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I feel like the blogging world would attract the Introverts since the Extroverts would probably just go up to some random person and start telling them their feelings (weirdos). I’m definitely of the introverted family. Raised as a single child and moved a couple times when I was young. I hate going to loud parties with people I don’t know, and I too, will find someone I know (usually just the hubs) and cling to him and start to panic when he has to go to the bathroom. I wear out tremendously when I have to go to social gatherings and a book/Netflix/video game and a beer at home sounds SO much more appealing than bar hopping downtown.
BUT…I hate cheetos.
Sorry.
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That has long been my theory about blogging, which is why we all like it so much. We can be part of a community where we can express our thoughts, but not have to do it verbally. I think that extroverts in general wouldn’t really gravitate towards writing, because they just wouldn’t have the patience or the time. Being alone in their thoughts is not really a fun thing for them.
And wow, I think you might be the 4th person to say they hate Cheetos. Not just dislike, but hate. I think I might need to do a little more research of the Cheetos hate. Is it the mess it leaves on the fingers or the crunch? Is it that people don’t like cheese or it is a little too sharp? I need to look into this Cheetos hating!
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The mess factor definitely is an issue. On top of being introverted, I’m also slightly type-A and definitely do not like crumby powdery messes. I like cheese. Real cheese. Not neon cheese powder. I’m sorry to disappoint.
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Not disappointing just interesting. I do avoid the powder on the hand by opening the pouch and skipping the middle man (my fingers) and pouring into my mouth. But as a type A you probably didn’t want to hear that either. I think I may have to write a post about this though. Interesting what kind of comments can come from something completely unrelated to the post. 🙂
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Maybe a pro-cheetos vs. anti-cheetos survey?
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I’ve already got a post in the works for tomorrow. Thanks for getting me to think about it!
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Introvert… and unemployed… I’m a dangerous combination. I barely have to leave the house at all! I may be in a state of overindulgence of my introverted-ness. And I’m okay with that… yet I get a sense that it’s somehow wrong. To someone.
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And what is wrong with not leaving the house? I used to think I had to do it every day, but now I’m like nah, I could just stay and nap and play with my electronics every day and be perfectly fine.
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Nothing’s wrong with it… not to me! And I know, I should stop wondering or worrying what anyone else thinks. Staying in has been a vital part in surviving unemployment – I’ve saved loads of money.
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Not only that but no one actually looks for a job outside anymore. It’s all online. I actually went into a place to present my resume and they kind of laughed at me.
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Yes. I just mean… Not having to go to work and being me – I slip into full hermit.
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Not having to make small talk with people you don’t want to is great. Makes me want to go to school just so I can have a job telecommuting.
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That’s what I want! Telecommuting job.
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It would be the greatest job ever! I would then need to move into a new house so I could have my private office that I would work a few hours a week in, uh I mean work hard all the time in my business attire.
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I’m an introvert and I loathe on-line gaming. I like games because I can accomplish so much on my own. I don’t want to have to “make friends” on-line in order to accomplish a quest Just let me do it on my own.
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Yep, online games with strangers are the worst. Especially when you just want to have fun and not be all competitive. It seems like some games make it almost unfair if you aren’t playing like 80 hours a day.
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Ha! I like that you add in that extroverts like on-line gaming, because I’m an introvert and hate it. When people find out I like video games they always ask me if I play Halo or Call of Duty and I’m like, “No….I don’t like relying on other people even in games.” That’s why I like games, because I can do everything by myself.
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Yeah, I never could figure out when they came out with online gaming what the big deal was. I have a few friends I play with, but playing online against strangers is kind of the worst.
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Hate cheetos. Loved this post.
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Wow, I’m surprised by how few people like Cheetos. I could eat them everyday. And the crunch, delightful…But thanks for liking the post at least.
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Aww I feel like I’ve hurt your feelings as the unofficial voice of Cheetos! Sorry.. They are just too orange and cheesy for me- I feel the same about the British equivalent (called Wotsits). If it makes you feel better there will be a response bias at play here- it’ll be the Cheetos-haters commenting disproportionately on this point!
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Actually, don’t feel bad. I was actually talking with others commentors on this post and it has inspired tomorrows post. I am just fascinated by the reasons behind it now. Tune it tomorrow for more about the Cheetos! Unless you are tired of hearing about them! 🙂
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Never – I find them weirdly mesmerising. I think it’s their faint glow.. Definitely post apocalyptical survival food
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I don’t plan on surviving the apocalypse, but if I did they would make survival so much better.
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I`m an introvert who masquerades as an extrovert.
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I was for a little while, but then just embraced my bitter introversion and now I don’t have to pretend anymore.
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I just wanted to point out the more significant matter here. Unicorns should exist.
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They may and if they do, I’m sure you will be the one to discover it. Just make sure you keep it safe from unicorn hunters.
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Ah, but there are more levels you’ve left out: Outgoing introverts/extroverts, and timid introverts/extroverts (and whatever falls in between). I am an ultra-introvert, and ultra-timid in any social situation where I don’t have a “hat” to wear (like “Mom,” “IT Worker,” or “Motivational Speaker.”). In a small social group (in theory, since I don’t really have one), I can be very outgoing, funny, and full of charisma, until I run out of gas and need to recharge in my cave.
BTW, Cheetos taste exactly like dirty socks smell. 😛
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Well, we can agree to disagree on the Cheetos and yeah there are levels of intro/extroversion. Just like there are a 7 billion people on the planet and all of them are different. This wasn’t meant to be an exhaustive list. Safe to say I’m on the introvert side of people that think we should unite together separately at our own houses.
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I’m far too introverted to leave a comment on this question.
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And I’m far too introverted to answer you.
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I’m a classic introvert, despite rumors to the contrary.
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Yep, me too. I can type all kinds of words when I’m on the blog, but when I’m in front of people, I get tired really easily of people’s crap and go hide in the corner.
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I always wish I could become invisible. Come to think of it, some people treat as if I am!
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And sometimes being invisible is a good thing. Other times it would be nice to be recognized for the good things you do.
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That is very true.
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You just reminded me that the company Christmas party announcement should be out soon. Help!
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Just make sure you hide out in a corner talking (or not talking) with the other introverts. They will understand.
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a true ambivert is someone who is on a stage before at least a thousand, or turns a party into a performance with led entertainment and audience participation, and then goes home, wraps up in a blanket, puts on an entire season of something, and drinks tea in copious amounts. Extra points if you get paid for the first. Double score, and vacation money, if your life partner does the same.
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Introverts can go to a party and have a fun time, but they gain energy from the alone time, when they don’t have to talk to someone. I think many people that think they are extroverts are actually introverts. I thought I was extroverted in college because I played a lot more and had friends, but in the end, I still needed my down time or I wouldn’t be able to thrive.
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nice. well thought through. thanks.
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I’m just glad I figured it out, so I know what to do in certain situations.
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This is hilarious. I love the roosters. And this is the funniest thing I’ve seen in a while: “INTROVERTS UNITE! Separately. In your own homes.” HA HA! Thanks so much :):):)
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I think the roosters explain things almost to a T, so yeah that one was pretty awesome. And yeah, it seems like introverts love blogging because they can connect together and type stuff to each other, without having to talk together and do small talk.
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Team Introvert! 😀
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Yeah! Let gather in the wood and take pictures and not talk to each other!
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Gather? Is there a way to do that virtually vs actually?
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I think there is some sort of webcam thing or whatever.
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I beg to disagree. I am an ambivert although I hadn’t realised I suffered from such a thing until I read your post.
My idea of heaven is sitting alone by the fire, reading with no one to talk to me. My other idea of heaven is a great night out in company and forgetting I intended to come home early.
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Well, those were actually just my opinions on what extroverts, introverts and ambiverts are. What ultimately determines if you are extro or intro is where you get your energy. If you feel energized by being at a party and being around people, and drained when you aren’t around people, extro. If you can go to a party and have fun, but afterwards need to go home and have some alone time, or some down time or just a place to go and focus on what happened at the party, you are an intro.
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Ambiverts and unicorns. Hmm, maybe they’re one and the same…
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Well apparently I’ve been told they do exist. One commenter tells me they are. Guess I found my unicorn.
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“I have a better chance of finding a unicorn than I do of getting through an entire day without dealing with some jackass.” –fake Bill Murray or eCards, depending how you google.
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Or it could be you, because you just said it. And those guys are fake and you are real.
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I am a scorching ambivert and I exist more than technically. Siddown, little one, you’re about to get schooled.
I love parties but not jibber jabber.
I love celebrating but not until closing time.
Someone who craves small talk better stay the hell away from me. It’s intellectual topics spiced with clever humor or nothing, thank you. And you better be quick.
Couch surfers and small talk aficionados are NOT mutually exclusive. Oh, hell, no. That’s why I don’t own a couch, it collects small talkers like a cardboard box collects cats.
I eschew any and all even loosely religious-based holidays because I am an atheist. However, the sales can be beneficial, especially on socks and chocolate.
I love all highly educated people who speak articulately and respectfully about topics that interest me. The rest can stick to Game of Thrones and what other people are doing.
I crave meetings of the mind, preferably at a rapid-fire pace, in limited segments.
Loud laughter is just fucking awesome.
All speaking is motivational speaking if you are talented enough to inspire people. The rest of the people out there are simply recycling observations, typically not even their own.
Being the center is an inefficient use of one’s resources; it’s much more powerful to weave in and out of the lunatic fringe and influence people to do your bidding. Bring me more wine and Stilton, minion!
I have no idea what “right and left” of attention means, so screw that. Right-brained and left-brained thinking, however, is an outdated psychological construct not unlike using only 15% of our brains, both of which have been recently overturned by more leading edge neuroscience. If you meant politics, I’d rather talk about sex.
Friends are great one or two at a time in intense doses like cocaine; family is straight up arsenic.
Videos games are only slightly less of a waste of time than exfoliating one’s balls with a cheese grater, all board games other than Trivial Pursuit should be shredded and used for lining hamster cages, and you already have my notes on GOT. You may extend this to include everything on television except science documentaries and stand up comedy.
In closing, us ambiverts regularly toggle between Full Speed Ahead and My Phone is Turned Off. It’s far more of a challenge than merely being an introvert or an extrovert, where you can easily find your kind and receive the support of the group. The group turns on you like a cat at the vet when you express a need outside their comfort zone. Ambiverts get to have it all but they’ve got to be way smarter than the herd in order to get it.
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Well, your name seems to say it all. All Thoughts. Sounds like I opened up Pandora’s box here. I appreciate your opinions on the matter and thanks for reading!
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I don’t know but I was wondering why there was a scowl on your face while I was clinging on to you during the Halloween party last night. Did you not enjoy my engaging conversation?
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Oh yeah, that party that I didn’t go to because I was out in the rain trick or treating in the pouring down rain? I think you were clinging to my doppleganger that is actually an introvert.
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Yeah, that party. Whatever dude.
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How could I have forgotten about that party? I guess I had way too much Orange Crush and Snickers…ughhh
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Right, and you ended up wearing a lamp shade and insulting my mom.
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Well the lap shade was just covering up my head from all the rain and tell your mom sorry.
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I’m not sure she will ever forgive you.
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My bitter heart is breaking.
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Not only that but she may have cursed you. Beware of the curse of the Jewish mother.
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I’ve heard about those curses. I’m hoping that she doesn’t curse me to be nice. That would make me so bitter.
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Ooooh, that’s a good one. You may have given her some ideas.
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Oops I probably shouldn’t have mentioned that.
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You have no idea.
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I don’t have a whole lot of ideas, no.
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And yet you manage to write a blog approximately 4 times a week.
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I know right? Seems pretty impressive until you realize how they are all just a variation of the same two posts. And I steal them all from your old posts.
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I knew they looked familiar!
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At least you know someone is reading your old posts secretly.
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Kind of creepy.
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Just wait until I get my creeper glasses.
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Loved this bitter post!!! Especially the introverts banding together in a separate show of support for their lonely brothers and sisters in arms! Keep up the bitter work, Ben.
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Yeah, I think the place where we unite the most is actually in the blogging arena. I’ve run into more blogging than just about anywhere else. Most extroverts seem to enjoy talking over blogging.
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Lovely post! Being an introvert I always find myself making friends with extroverts. I guess it’s easier when someone else does the talking 😀
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I do like them for that, but they can always be exhausting to be around too. I have a son that is an extrovert and he wears me out everyday with his talking.
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Can I just say, I HATE Cheetos!!!
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No you may not. Not acceptable. You need to get your tastebuds checked.
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Oh, that was my bad. I should not have asked permission, I should have just gone ahead and shouted: I HATE Cheetos! And their ads are mean-spirited and stupid!
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Ha ha! I wrote a follow up post, just for you and your bitterness toward Cheetos. Okay maybe not just you, but others too!
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I shall read it and make a suitably bitter comment.
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I’m sure your bitterness will shine through like Cheetos dust.
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Ew, Cheetos dust. I feel bitter already
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I figured you would love it.
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