Gates must be so bitter

/ bensbitterblog
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All I ever wanted to do was guard this place.

The Tom Brady thing about deflated balls just won’t go away. This thing happened so long ago, I was like in my early to late 41’s when it came out.  Here it is in August 2015 and it is still in the news.  So much so, that it has received the prestigious seal of approval of the “gate” suffix.

I decided to look on Wikipedia all the scandals that had become gates, and realized there are so many scandals named after gate, that they had to break them up between sports, entertainment, politics and even technology.

All gate ever wanted to do was swing open and swing shut.  Maybe keep a kid safe or prevent some “regular” person from walking into a rich community.  But thanks to Water, gates are now involved in every single scandal from this one to that one.  Do you think that scandals can just give “Gate” a break and let someone else take on the scandal suffix for once?

The

Thanks for keeping the Dinosaurs out!

How about blinds or shutters or fences?  Even the richest man in the world had to take the Gate name.  What is going to happen when Bill Gates is involved in a scandal? Are they going to call it GateGate? I just can’t imagine how bitter gate must be when it gets lumped in with all the scandals.  Just let the guy keep a flying dinosaur out, or block an army from getting into the castle instead of having to be embarrassed for Tom Brady’s deflations anymore.

ARRRGGGHHHHH

Bitter Gaterade Ben

27 thoughts on “Gates must be so bitter”

  1. Bitter Ben, you are often right in your bitterness, but rarely have you been so completely right. I say let’s relieve the gates of their bitterness, and let’s commemorate the Teapot Dome Scandal of the Warren Harding administration by calling every scandal a dome from now on. Tom Brady and Deflatedome sounds much more accurate and bitter, doesn’t it? J.

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