40 Years of Late Night Shenanigan Bitterness

/ bensbitterblog
A gif of My Saturday Night Shenanigans.

A gif of My Saturday Night Shenanigans.

There was a whole lot of things going on in the world this weekend.  First, trending on twitter, people were anticipating my doctor’s appointment, #excusetoleavealittleearly.  FYI, I didn’t die, so I guess things turned out alright. Then, there was that lame game night that was planned for the evening.  You will be bitter to know that I did terribly at Catch Phrase, the 300 piece puzzle went off with lots of hitches, and Chess was a complete failure, because first, they sunk my battleship and second, the timer when off before I could double jump the red king.  Besides, I didn’t have Ron Weasely around to show me how to move my Bishop without getting myself killed.  Finally, there was a really huge event where men and women got together with someone they really cared about.  They got on their best clothing, ordered limos and stayed up late, talked about their love…of comedy.  They talked and laughed and reminisced about the anniversary…the 40th anniversary of Saturday Night Live.

As you might know I am 41 years old, which means I have watched every single episode of every season of Saturday Night Live and that makes me more qualified to judge how bitter I am that I didn’t get a 3 1/2 hour special for my 40th anniversary of living.  Like Saturday Night Live, I kept people up late at night with my annoying sense of humor and just like Saturday Night Live, I also have a cheesy background. Here are three other ways Saturday Night Live made me bitter.

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Why is staying awake so hard…

Saturday – Saturday is supposed to a sacred day where I lay around avoiding work, not thinking even more than regular and not having to concentrate on anything new. This was a tradition going all the way back to when I was born. At the age of 1, when I was “expected” to start walking or at least crawling, I was slacking on the couch, watching repeats of Tom And Jerry, and I fell asleep. Like 12 hours later, and I shot up from my nap, as I sensed that something new was invading the television airwaves. I was angry, bitter and appalled that someone dare do something new on a Saturday.

"I ate the knight."

“I ate the knight away.”

Night – Batman claims to be the Dark Knight.  Is it because he fights criminals at night because they have jobs during the day and don’t really like to rob banks and terrorize people during the day? Or is it because his dark costume would look kind of silly during the day? Or is it because his name wouldn’t really be very intimidating if it was the Dark Day?  Or the Bright Knight?  Regardless, I don’t think he can really claim to be the Dark Knight unless he’s been on Saturday Knight Live. Conversely, Saturday Knight Live can’t claim to be the king of late Knight unless they’ve had Batman on.  Until then, I will be the King of Late Nights.  Just too lazy to go to bed.

Why would they say Live on air, when they really mean live on air?

Why would they say Live on air, when they really mean live on air?

Live – Something bothers me about this show.  For 4-0 years, yes that is 4-0 years, they’ve pronounced the word wrong.  For 4-0 years, not one actor, actress, host, comedian, musical guest, writer, camera operator, or show runner could ever say the word right.  It is pronounced live like “Don’t die dude, you need to live!!!!” It’s pretty pathetic that an idiot like myself can somehow pronounce it right when thousands of professionals that get paid thousands of dollars to write and say funny things, yet somehow couldn’t figure out how to say this simplest of words right.  It’s clear I need to be the showrunner for this fact alone.  And also for 4-0 years, they kept forgetting the say live at the end of the opening.  It should be, “Live from New York, it’s Saturday Day Night…Live!”

And by the way, Saturday Night Live has been doing things for 40 years on Saturdays.  Now all of a sudden they do their 40th Birthday on Sunday? That’s like me having my birthday on April 9th every year and then all of a sudden when I turn 40 to change it to April 10th.  Doesn’t make any sense, but then when did that show ever make any sense?

Arrrghhhh

Bitter Night Live Ben

 

184 thoughts on “40 Years of Late Night Shenanigan Bitterness”

      • I loved the 40th celebration. It was more funny as a whole than the regular weekly shows. Of course…choosing the best clips makes that pretty easy to achieve.

        Bitter question posed to the gentleman: Were you surprised to see Norm McDonald not only in attendance….but in a skit? All I’ve ever heard was bitterness from both sides regarding his performance and exit when he was a cast member.

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        • I was not aware of his bitterness with the show. Of course cutting himself off didn’t seem to do much good as I haven’t seen much of him over the years. Though I suppose he does stand up all over the place like most of them. I was surprised that they featured Kayne so much considering he is such a tool and the Mike Meyers thing in Wayne’s World was kind of cool considering how he’s been buried since the Love Guru.

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    • Eddie Murphy was pretty bad, considering he had 30 years to come up with something good, but then again, have you seen any good Eddie Murphy movies since the Nutty Professor? But Miley and Kanye were pretty bad too. Could Kayne at least stand up when he is trying to sing?

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  6. I’m so glad to know you are alive! Or, should I say… a liv? I am obviously behind on my twitter!
    SNL was one of my all time favorites. I used to want to be a writer for SNL when I was a kid, starting from the age of 8, I think. But, we lived in WY, and I let my fear of competing against so many brilliant people (and just people in general) deter me from even trying to do such a thing. I wish I could go back and tell myself to at least try anyway. But wait! This just means I have something to be bitter about! 😀

    And, Dammit, you should have gotten a 40th anniversary of living episode, too!

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    • Yeah, somehow I survived the weekend. I think it’s only because I got that extra day for President’s Day. I’m pretty bitter that SNL hasn’t hired you as a writer yet. I assume they are going to hire you right after the 40th anniversary special to make up for their idiotic mistake. I will not be watching it again until they hire you. I assume they stole the Celebrity Jeopardy sketch from you, because that was awesome.

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      • Thank you, Ben! I’m guessing it would be pretty intimidating to write for SNL amongst all those talented comedians. When I was a kid, I just thought about how awesome it would be to spend my day sitting in a room full of funny people making up jokes and skits all day. HA! I still think that would be one of the best things, ever.

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  7. I’m bitter that Don Pardo passed on and couldn’t hang on just a bit longer for the 40 year reunion. And I’m with you Ben “Saturday Night Live!” on a Sunday, and for such a special event. No wonder NBC is struggling in the ratings. Who is in charge of programming over there!

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  9. In my endless quest to needlessly comment on your site with inane comments that no one really cares about…did I ever tell you how much I hate gifs? It’s like I keep waiting for something else to happen but the same thing just keeps happening over and over again. Plus, I think they are likely to induce an epileptic seizure.

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