The Little Engine Literally Couldn’t Even Either.
Apparently there is a movement among the young people of the world, particularly the high school aged ones that are having a hard time comprehending how they can even… Not sure what they can’t even…Is it that they have to walk uphill both ways to school? Or is that they have to get up at 5 am to deliver papers in 4 feet of snow every morning? Or that they have to milk the cows every morning and evening? Or is it that they have to work a full time job and go to school and have a huge list of chores when they get home? Or is it that their mortgage is behind, and their kids are crying because they don’t have any food or water? Or is really because the barista spelled their name “Sindea” Cindy on their coffee sleeve, or their favorite nail polish blushing berry red is out at Target and they can’t even go to Walmart to get it. (Actually, I don’t blame them for not wanting to go to Walmart.) Let’s just say it is Friday and I can’t even…
I can’t even…
…do the same old song and twerk.
It’s Friday and I can’t even…
…wait until lunch.
I can’t even…
…wait to go swimming.
I can’t even…
…get my own pizza.
I can’t even…
…eat those fries.
I can’t even…
…make a milkshake with only 2% milk.
I can’t even…
…stand the traffic today.
I can’t even…
…wait for this heart attack to happen.
I can’t even…
…jump today.
I can’t even…
…believe the volleyball is magnetized.
I can’t even…
…make a shot today.
I can’t even…
…win a game of dodge ball.
I can’t even…
…do this anymore.
I’m out.
ARRRRGGGHHHHHH
Bitter Can’t Even Ben
Ben's Bitter Blog 
Bitter Ben doesn’t drink? That explains the bitterness!
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That would explain part of it. Also the high expectation, low result life of mine.
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Reading this on Sunday…I couldn’t even…..
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I can’t even…and this is a Tuesday. My least favorite day of the week.
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Love the zombie-like woman dancing in the first GIF–good choices to kick off the weekend, Ben! 🙂
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That is the kind of people we need to put on Dancing with the Stars. It would be so much better if it was the worst Dancing people.
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Can[t even say it’s Friday but enjoyed anyway!!
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Well, it sure would be nice if it could be Friday today, but I’m not really feeling this Tuesday thing.
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I literally can’t even… stop laughing about pizza cat! If it was my pizza, I would be so bitter. But since it’s not, GAHAHAHA!
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Let me just tell you, that if that was my cat, it would be spending time in the time out area…wherever that is for cats.
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Yeah… Cat discipline is tricky. Especially since they own the house…
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Yeah, there are no good cat tricks and they will never let you walk them on a leash.
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Yes things that make you go Hmmm! or WTF!
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Most of my things just make you want to be bitter. I hope…
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No but I’ll read your blog!
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Well, thanks goodness someone does.
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That kid jumping in the “puddle” is going to give me nightmares tonight.
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Just imagine if you were his parent.
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real scary.
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Halloween scary.
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Bitter Ben might just need a good stiff bitter drink.
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Bitter Ben doesn’t drink, so maybe a stiff drink of water?
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On the rocks..
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Sometimes I have water on the rocks.
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Yummeh
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Ice cream?
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Yes and pizza
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Pizza is welcome.
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It better be…
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It always is.
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But it makes you happy not bitter..
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It’s the bitter circle. I get bitter and that makes me happy, which makes me bitter. I’ll always end with bitter.
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But on a happy note
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and yet always ending on a bitter note…
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With a happy melody?
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Bitter melody.
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Bitter it is!
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Bitter it always is.
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Well Merry Bitter to you.
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And a bitter Christmas season to you.
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Why thank you. Here’s a new word.. “Bittermas” what do you think?
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My wife said I should do the twelves days of something and I think Bittermas might work.
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I can’t wait to read it!
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I can’t wait to find out what it is…
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Is this bitter excitement?
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It’s just bitter bitterness.
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Okay so bitter bittercitement
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I can’t even believe dudes play volleyball. I thought that was just a sport for hot chicks in bikinis.
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I guess they are granted permission in other countries, but not here.
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I literally can’t even laugh right now because then my boss will know I’m not working.
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I’m gonna need your boss to start reading this blog, so you are given permission to laugh out loud for once. Sorry, LOL for once.
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In addition to the ‘I can’t even’, I’ve also recently heard people say ‘whatevs’. Like mustering up the ‘er’ to complete the word is just too much to handle??? And yes, these people were considerably younger than me…
Feeling old, (and a bit bitter).
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They can’t finish words because it is so much effort to type that in a text or a tweet or to drag themselves away from a computer.
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Was it that bitch Cindy who stole the last berry nail polish?
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No, it was freaking Sindea, but heaven forbid she spell her name like a freaking human.
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Slut.
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You poor thing. How will you even make it through the day to the weekend?
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Probably not, but I’m sure not going to put much effort into making it, that’s for sure.
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Well, then if you fail, which you undoubtably will, at least you didn’t put too much into it!
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I make sure to put maximum effort into something that I really want so that when it fails I am bitter in the biggest way.
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Maximum effort? That doesn’t sound like you. Are you okay?
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Maximum effort on bitterness. Maximum effort on taking naps. No, I’m not okay. If I was okay, I wouldn’t be so bitter.
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There’s blogging for that.
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But writing takes so much effort.
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I see a bitter circle…
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An eternal one for me.
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OMG. This blog? I can’t even……
Good one!
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I know right? I can’t even…today.
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Love it! Such a good laugh on a Friday!
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I just call it my lazy post day because all I have to do is collect some gifs and write stuff about them.
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I can’t even…believe how long it’s been since I left you a bitter comment.
Seriously, I haven’t even seen the new layout until now. Shame, shame on me. But it looks good!
Hope you have a bitterly good Friday.
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I know Tiff! It has been a while since we hatched up the evil plan to start Chaos! At least we have a twitter account and a logo! And at least two followers, you and me. I was thinking about doing a post about start my own Con, called bittercon, but I bet an evilcon would be a great thing to start. What do you think? People would do cosplay, dressing up as their favorite villains? Call it Chaoscon?
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Oh my goodness, I know. Maybe evil Santa should bring more advances in the Chaos campaign. BitterCon would be pretty epic. An EvilCon would be awesome though….a gathering all about villainy and dastardly deeds…hosted by Chaos, of course. It could be the start of something big. Just call it EvilCon…(or maybe work on that name later) Chaos would just be the host. Yes, I think this is brilliant…
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We need to hire someone to work for Chaos that will execute all our ideas, since we are the idea people. Who do you think will be a good little minion that will work for free and not complain at all while we demad they execute all our ideas?
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I’ll have to think about that one. Probably someone who spends all their time on the internet anyway, who has lots of spare time because they probably don’t have a job. (they would be working for us, of course). Let me consider…
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I wish I knew someone. Oh, I know. How about my kids. Free labor and they don’t have near enough to do. I will hire my mini-minions.
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LOL, those are fabulous. No matter how bad my day gets at least I can say I haven’t stepped in man hole or tried to use myself like a human basketball. Of course the day is still young, perhaps I shouldn’t be so hasty…
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I sure hope that I never spontaneously just happen to jump off the roop into a basketball hoop and ruin any chance of me becoming a dad a third time.
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