I’ve been doing this blogging thing for over 2 1/2 years years now, and pretty regularly I might add. When there are so many things I have to be bitter about, there has always been a wealth of subjects to choose from. You’ve probably read a few posts and cringed thinking “Is it even possible for this guy to write any worse about a subject?” and you would be spot on. I can tell you for a fact that there were some days when I could barely spit out enough words to express how bitter I was. Those days were the most bitter for me. Especially when I started a subject that I knew was super bitter, but started it and had no clue where the heck it was going. I abandoned these poor posts into the Lost World called drafts. If this blog was a BluRay, these would be the deleted scenes, or more appropriately the bloopers. If this blog was a Time Machine, these would be the Dolorean without the flux capacitor.
At this moment, there are 142 Lost Posts(and that is just the ones that are here on WordPress. I have dozens more notes in my phone taking up space.) that have never seen the light of day, and may never. But I was thinking that every once in a while I will let a post out, and you can take a look at one that started with some bitterness and fizzled out or just never had any business being a post. You can thrash it, scoff at it, make fun of its grammar and spelling, or give me hints on how I might revive it. Or just ignore it, like I should have in the first place. So, with all that ado, I present you my First Lost Bitter Post.
This one was started back on April 18, 2013 (were any of your blogs even born then?) and I called it Monument of Bitterness.
When I was growing up, I lived right near one of the most famous national monuments in the world. By close I mean 372 miles away according to google, so of course I went at least once every 15 years. Since I lived in South Dakota for 15 years, I did manage to go once. As fun as it is to stare at some people’s granite faces for an hour, it wasn’t. If I wanted to do that, I would stare at Congress, which I refuse to do. I was more interested in the nearby town called Hot Springs, that surprisingly had a natural hot spring. They built an indoor waterslide park that had rocks on the bottom of the pool. And the water was warm (also a shocker).
I don’t know if it just the condescending look of these guys faces, but they make me bitter. It’s like they actually got together in a famous presidents conference and told someone that a they needed to go to the middle of America at a future date, where there was nothing else and find a mountain and carve granite images of them. Like we are supposed to be impressed with some guys that did speeches on taxes or signed some bill on health care? Where is the mountain for bitterness?
Though these guys seem bitter by the looks on their faces, deep down inside they were probably happy people that enjoyed their lives.
mountain needed sure the people on the mountain are famous for some reason. Maybe they passed a bill on health care or made a rousing speech about taxes. Sure they should be applauded for that. I’m just very bitter about it not being updated in about 100 years or something like that. I think it is time we updated this monument. How about instead of four faces of presidents in granite, we build a monutment to bitterness. If we can’t find more than
And then it ended there. So, what do you think? Revive it, send it to the trash, ignore it?
ARRRRRRGGGHHHHH
Bitter “The Lost Blog Posts” Ben
Combine it with another lost post, insert a bunch of gif’s and see how many people tell you you’re brilliant – it seems to work on TV
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I just did another lost post which I’m sure you are just thrilled about.
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Yes, bring it back!
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Maybe I will or maybe I’m just to lazy to finish anything.
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I live really close to Stone Mtn. It is another great attraction if you like giant faces carved into rocks. It is of confederate generals, so that might be a nice, bitter topic. I recommend seeing in in the summer when they do a laser show.
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Stone Mountain sounds like a great place to put my face because I have a stone cold bitter look as well as a cold bitter personality. I would fit right in there.
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Just so you know, and I hope it’s ok, I featured your blog in my blog this morning 🙂
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Yeah, I saw that this morning. I was quite shocked that you would even want to mention mine. I just hope that it added more bitterness to your blog.
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Indeed! Hopefully it got you some more traffic!! 🙂
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Before I even knew it, there were three people that came over. So yet, uptick. Thanks!
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I meant yep uptick.
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Yay!
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Bring it back to life!
You can’t just leave it like this “If we can’t find more than…”
Well, you can, but, I mean, bring it back to life!
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I’ll see if I have the necessary skills to perform CPR on it. Most of the time I don’t, or I push to hard and kill it even worse. But every once in a while a bitter gem will come out of it.
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I already have around 15 drafts. I’m sure that at least 10 of them are never going to be posted, and you can thank me for that.
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You have no idea how few of those 142 posts are worth the ink from my computer to type out. The one I posted yesterday was one of the better ones.
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Super fun post, BF.
I love how it just randomly STOPS.
I have quite a few posts like this, only mine aren’t actually ABOUT anything.
Anyway, doing this might free up some time to potentially write on a certain book? Maybe possibly?
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That is how most of my drafts end. I will write for a while, realize it isn’t happening then just end it right there. Then I get frustrated and see if I have any other partially written posts I can revive from the dead.
It probably won’t give me any more time to write on a certain book, but know that it is now being worked on at lunch. Haven’t yet found the ability to write on it while at home. Too many distractions, and not enough shed.
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I totally get it. Mine just randomly stop too. I have quite a few saved posts on my computer intended to be put on here that are actually ABOUT STUFF. (Not writing or work.) Those are finished and just sitting. Well, most of them are.
How is the lunch-writing going?
Always too many distractions and not enough shed, even when you have a shed. Such is life, I suppose.
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I have a few that are finished that were just used for other purposes (like a guest post or two). So I guess I could put those out and people would see that there are some that are finished but unpublished on my blog.
Lunch writing is actually going well. I’m starting all over with Chapter 1 and starting with a different tone, using the ole sense of humor instead of so serious.
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Um…finish it?! What does the face of bitterness look like when carved on a mountain?
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Finish it? You sound so convinced that I should do it. The face of bitterness looks exactly like my bitter photo that is sideways. It would pretty crazy next to the other heads that are face up.
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Yes finish it! How’s that?
That would be, I think Bitter Ben should be carved
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That’s what they all say, until they see the finished product until they cry bitter tears about it.
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Well that’s what you want to happen right?!
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I want others to cry bitter tears, yes. But there are many ways to do that.
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and I’m sure you know the many?
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Of course I know the many. I know the all.
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All hail oh great Bitter Ben
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You just gave me a good idea for that monument post. I will do a bitter Mt. Rushmore, with my face being the bitterest and three other bitter people on there. Thanks.
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I can’t wait! Anytime!
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Good, you might be waiting for a while, so I’m glad you are patient unlike me.
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Me patient. I am not! I get bitter when I have to wait…
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Well you bitter get that way, cause it won’t be for a while. Or whatever.
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say what?
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I’m actually surprised your face is not on there. Maybe we can do something about that…
-Your Campaign Manager
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I think if my face was on there, tourism would go way down and the State of South Dakota would go bankrupt and have to become part of Nebraska. Because of that, I have decided to get my face up there so that can become a bitter reality.
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That would probably be the best thing that could possibly happen EVER.
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I do have a lot of good ways to destroy South Dakota. I guess it would help to have not earned my bitterness from that place so much.
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You really ‘lost ‘me on that last paragraph….
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I “lost” more than a few people on that post.
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I think it’s perfect! So bitterly funny to start with 🙂 I am v happy you revived this Lost Post and I look forward to reading many more 🙂 So what if it doesn’t end – that is part of the bitterness 😉
I think a lot of people sit down, write their post, and post it! I do too, sometimes, but mostly I have a draft going that I work on for a while. I only have about 11 drafts at the mo – which I thought was pretty bad – till I saw your 142. Now I am bitter that I am such an under-achiever 😀
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When I was looking through a lot of them, I realized that I had a ton of them, but a lot of them were just titles or just a few words. Then ones like this that just made it half way. Some were pretty long and rambly. When you have over 400 posts, you are bound to have quite a few drafts.
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Wow! That’s a lot of posts! So much bitterness! 😀
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There is so much to be bitter about. All you have to do is look around!
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