Many claim that the mountains are majestic, and beautiful and good for skiing and fun to climb. As a member of the “Growing up in the Midwest without My Permission” Club, I happen to think that they are just in my way. If I want to drive through them, I have to fight all kinds of gravity to overcome them. If I want go under them, I have to use my industrial sized drill to mine an underground cave. If I want to go around them, I have to go all the way to Canada somewhere, or down to somewhere in Mexico. Because I don’t like wasting time (yes I do), mountains make me bitter for getting in my way.
You know what else gets in my way? These things.
Trees…
yep, trees are always getting in my way.
Waves…
…always getting in the way-ve.
Pants….
..always a barrier to comfort.
Glass…
…not only a barrier for ceilings but for getting a drink.
Always getting in the way…
..rival marching gangs.
Always getting in the way…
…other people.
Always getting in the way….
…the overpowered air conditioning.
The mighty obstacles…
…of the raging rivers.
The unstoppable force….
…of slippery floors.
The immovable object...
…of sleep.
Gravity…
…the Great Barrier Reef of love.
Let’s tear down these walls of Oppression…
…never mind, they are just dominoes.
On this Bitter Friday, let’s just push through all these annoying obstacles, because they are getting in the way of us being lazy and that really makes me bitter.
AAAARRRRGGGGHHHH
Bitter Mountain Man Ben
Ben's Bitter Blog 
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Oh my gosh, stop. I cannot read your blog while I am at work because I either get caught giggling (the picnic table) or just staring into the screen in wonder (the rest of them).
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You probably can’t read it from home either. You have way more important things to do than waste time on stupid blogs.
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Stupid dogs? DOGS? How dare you not mention CATS?
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Stupid cats most of all. Thinking they are royals.
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With you on the mountain thing. Mountains can go to hell.
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They are always snowing on my parade.
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Windsurfing: Another sport I will never try.
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Good thing you don’t live near any water right? Other than that ocean thingy.
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Lol, and I love mountains.
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Mountains are just as bad as traffic.
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😦
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I love watching other people fail- for a change. (I’m so bitter.)
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Watching others fail is almost a sport for me. I keep stats and watch for it religiously. If I’m not failing myself, I watching others fail.
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Who needs to wear pants anyway! They are stifling and I would avoid them like this if I could. Shorts are preferred.
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I think pants are designed as a way for the corporate world to toture us even more.
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The pictures are great. I have to disagree that it’s the mountains in the way, though. I think it’s the people that are in the way. 🙂
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The mountains are just one thing that get in my way. People are quite another(the most annoying other).
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Aw, the one of the baby is just plain mean. (although I still laughed at it)
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It is one that I would have done if I knew of any babies that are suckers.
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i’ve had this same issue when trying to take a sip after having a few fancy drinks with straws.
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Stupid windows getting in your way? There is always something getting in my bitter way.
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Why would anyone ever think the pants thing is a good idea? When would anyone ever have to jump into a pair of pants two guys are holding up for them?
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Apparantly they have never heard of shorts or pajama bottoms. I think the corporate dress code needs to change to those things.
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The Great Barrier Reef of love? Surely you jest! ( yah, I know, stop calling you Shirley)
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Of course I jest. I have no love in this bitter heart of mine.
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Plus, there are yetis.
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And if I was a Yeti I would be the kind that scared all the kids on purpose.
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This post got in the way of my getting coffee for a few minutes, but I can’t resist gifs, whatever they are.
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I hope your coffee was super bitter and the gifs were not to your liking.
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