So Halloween happened yesterday, on a Thursday(in case you can’t read calendars or are not the master of obvious like me). This post is dedicated to all those who either forgot that it was Thursday yesterday and it was near impossible to drag themselves out of bed, or are like me and remembered, but don’t want to be here anyways(of course that is every day, but today in particular). So how about some bitter Friday pictures to depress you more. So whether you want them or not, here they are for you bittertainment.
Since Halloween is over, you might want to wake up early before work and go for a run. Just kidding, why would anyone ever want to go for a run? That would help you be healthier, tireder, and out of breathier. Doesn’t make sense. Some may say it is a good way to get ready for work by getting your mind right. Does this look like a good way to get your mind right?
I’m keep telling you running is not a good thing.
Besides if you run, then you have to shower and get ready and it might make you a minute later than you normally leave for work. A minute might not seem like a long time, but you are wrong.
So glad I went for a run and left a minute later.
No worries, you might get there a half hour later. But I’m sure your boss is lenient. He or she probably doesn’t mind. But maybe your client or other people might have a pressing need. But you know, they are probably in some other time zone, so they can wait right? Nothing pressing happens early in the day right? Or maybe….
Maybe you need to get Jurassic to work on time.
Because you were late, you flubbed that task up. So now your boss assigns you a really menial task as punishment. You have to be the work “recycling specialist”.
Soda pressing indeed.
After that task humiliates you and causes a deep work depression, you finally make it to lunch. Yeah only half the day is over! Since you didn’t have time to get gas on the way to work, you can’t go out to lunch, so you have to eat some crummy, homeade gruel from home. At least if you eat at your cubicle you will be completely available to be bothered by annoying co-workers.
“It looks like you are at lunch, but can I just ask you a few questions? Won’t take more than an hour.”
Thankfully, you at least you got two minutes to eat something so you can be raring to go for your afternoon TPS reports that need to be done by the end of the day.
That post lunch high.
Now that you have done all your highly important essential tasks, like watching cat videos, checking your Facebook and answering the two comments from your blog, time to get to work. But you are so bored now.
Don’t ever get this bored.
Finally after what seems like 16 hours, but was only 8, it is time to go home.
Forget my TPS report.
Sooo glad I came to work today. Moral of the story? Don’t go running, because it will make you late. And we all know what happens when we are late. Bitter Day.
Arrrggghhhh
Bitter Day Ben
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I forgot Halloween. Thank you for reminding me. I’m running away now to answer my two blog comments.
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I would go have some leftover candy then get to your comments. It could take a while.
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I’ve had a few encounters with raptors, and I know it’s left me bitter… : )
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The photo of the traffic is perfect. I pretty much hate driving always, no matter what the traffic is doing, but I hate real traffic a LOT.
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I try to avoid it whenever I can. I usually go way early just to avoid it.
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I’m supposed to run 20 miles tomorrow in prep for my first marathon and there is a snowfall warning in effect. Is that bitterness I am starting to feel??
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That bitterness you feel has been sent directly my way and I feel the cool chill of it as we speak. For the sake of all of us, run that marathon in the snow and cold so I can sense the bitterness from where you are.
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Ben thankfully the marathon is in Sacramento but I am sure in the next five weeks of training here you will be able to feel a fair amount of bitterness. Stay tuned….
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Find your bitterness by running the marathon. That is a great idea. Keep doing it and report back to me how bitter it makes you.
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(Love the backgroud btw). Yes, the traffic. LOUD laughing, and so true. But I got the biggest kick out of that first photo. That’s what would happen to me, for sure, if I ran!
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Better to remain still and the beast would just get tired of chasing you like a dog does and start licking your face.
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I want one of those Flying Grim Reaper kites or whatever it is.
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Never heard of them. They must spell doom to all grass that they fall upon.
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He’s the guy in your first image.
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Oh right. I always forget what I write almost immediately after I write. Side effect of bitterness.
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The gif of the guys running killed me. I’ve been sitting at my desk watching it over and over.
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That sounds so productive. I hope you don’t get so bored of doing that, that your end of doing work to pass the time.
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No, because I can always go through my e-mails and organize them. I don’t think that *really* counts as work.
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Keep up the good work of avoiding work as long as possible.
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What about running for president?
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I wouldn’t even run for president. I might walk or lay down for president, but then again it would be too much work to be the president. You have to talk to people, you couldn’t sleep in, you have to do speeches…all sounds like a headache.
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Kelp does not believe in running either.
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Maybe kelp swims instead?
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Kelp enjoys lazing in the sand and napping. It’s just much easier on the constitution.
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Now that sounds like a bitter paradise. Can I go to Hawaii to do that?
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Kelp is unsure of this “Hawaii” of which you bitterly speak. However, Kelp does not recommend desert sand. It is typically too hot and leads to swamp ass. And that is no good for anybody, bitter or otherwise.
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I’ve always believed running is the root of all evil. Now I know for sure.
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It right there in the Bible somewhere. The love of running is the root of all evil or something?
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I made the mistake of being too productive too quickly this morning instead of parsing it out throughout the day… I plan on making up for it by slacking off the remainder of the workday.
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Whenever I wake up, I realize that I have been too productive and try to go back to sleep, but the boss(wife boss) makes me go every day.
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I presume you, like many others, must be on the cusp of further, even deeper bitterness as ‘pictures’ are not coming out on the Reader thing today! I have posted two captions that are pictureless thus rendering my activities pointless – am wondering if this is only affecting tall people who use WordPress! Other than that, great stuff!
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My terrible writing is always hidden by the brilliant pictures I steal, so yeah a little bitter.
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I’ve just checked with the wife, a bitter woman at best, and she is concerned for your welfare, she says, ‘hang on in there, stay bitter, do not doubt yourself,’ and I promise you she knows! God how I know!
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Tell her thanks for the bitter wishes. It has given me strength to remain bitter and not cling to any hope of sweetness.
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Soda Pressing? Good one!!!
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I’m kind of genius when it comes to stealing puns from memes, pictures or smart people.
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I would expect no less from you. 🙂
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Most people don’t expect anything at all from me.
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You strive to submerge to the lowest level of expectations. That takes talent. 🙂
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I try my least.
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You are so bitterly right! Leave half a second later, and I’m in the worse traffic jam of my life!
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That is why I leave half and hour early and get work early so I can leave early.
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